Eulogy. BETTY READER 99 • May 22, 2009 -Lakeside, Graveside Rabbi Jonathan Berkun
This week in the synagogue, we will begin reading from the fourth book of the Torah, Bamidbar. In English, however, the book is called "Numbers," because it begins with a census, a counting, of each member of the Israelite nation. As we read from the portion that speaks of counting, we also fmd ourselves in the midst of a Jewish period of counting, called the Orner. The Orner is a period of exactly seven weeks-49 days-that are counted with a special blessing from the holiday of Passover to the holiday of Shavuot that begins one week from today.
Whether it be counting people or counting days, Judaism has much to say on both subjects. And when we sadly confront the death of a loved one, we become particularly conscious of time's steady flow. Days pass, sometimes without us noticing. So we plead, as did the psalmist, limnot yameinu ken hoda, v'navi !'vav chochmah. "Teach us, a Lord, to number our days, so that we may attain a heart of wisdom."
Today, as we fmd ourselves in the midst of a season of counting, we bid farewell to Betty Reader. Betty was blessed to count 99 years of life, and she left this world one month into her hundredth year. I say those numbers out loud and with pride, for they are as close as most anyone would come to the well wishing blessing we often say, "ad me 'ah v'esrim," May you live until one hundred twenty.
That was the age of Moses when he passed. But in all his hundred and twenty years, Moses never made it to the Promised Land. And if we are granted fewer years than he, the measure ought be not how close we were in number, but how close we were in leading a blessed and fulfilling life.
Cousin Betty, as she was known by her family, knew how to number her days. She knew that it was not quantity but quality that mattered. She thanked God every night for her life and for her family. She thanked God for her two loving husbands and for her cherished cousins, relatives, and friends. She thanked God for all the comforts and joy she knew in her life. Betty Reader counted every day of her life because she made every day count.
Everyone who knew Betty loved Betty. She was a strong woman, a survivor. She never complained and with her beautiful blue eyes, she always saw the positive and the good in everything. We extend our deepest sympathies to her family.
Betty was born in Pittsburgh, P A on April 18, 1910 to Ralph & Ida Goldberg. She was the middle child in the family, her older sister the late Della Schneider, and her younger brother Nathan Goldberg. Betty's mother was a very generous person, and her legacy lingered in Betty's memory throughout her life. Ida Goldberg used to welcome anyone who needed shelter or a meal.
Betty was educated in Pittsburgh, and after school began working as a buyer for Saks 5th Avenue, a position she enjoyed for many years. The company relocated Betty to Florida, where she lived and worked for some time before meeting and marrying Charlie Siegel. Betty and Charlie were married for many years, and for much of the that time they lived in Greenwich village near the store that Charlie owned-Siegel's Shoes. In fact, Betty remained a part owner of the store until the day she died.
When Charlie passed away, Betty moved to Florida again. She then met Joe Reader, with whom she also shared a loving and special marriage. Unfortunately, he passed away after only 6 years of marriage. He has been resting here for 18 years, only now for his soul to be reunited with Betty's.
Betty enjoyed two wonderful marriages to two special men. They were both menches, and Betty enjoyed a good life with them. She enjoyed playing golf and going to the country club. She enjoyed going to the theatre and playing cards. She enjoyed going on cruises and trips, especially with her extended family, who 9 years ago took her on a 90th birthday cruise together with 15 members of her family.
Betty was a classy lady who had professionally exquisite taste in clothes andjewelry.
She had elegance and style, and she was always well mannered and proper. She loved being with her family for holiday celebrations, and she also gave back to the community as a lifetime member of Hadassah.
The life of Betty Reader was itself the answer to the psalmist's plea. She counted her days with wisdom, and filled her life with blessing and love. Now that her time has reached its conclusion, she has left behind a legacy of memories to be treasured by her family and honored by her friends.
When one has lived a life such as this, to taste some of the fruit of her hundredth year, we can be only grateful. Grateful that God has gi-anted Betty such a heart of wisdom, that she was able to fill her days with significance and meaning.
May our memories of Betty Reader provide us with strength and comfort in the days, months and years to come.
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